Last night, I couldn't sleep. I lay there worried about the future, thinking of everything I need to do to get squared away for the Spring term. I turned on the computer and looked at three of the blogs I follow: Megan Rencher, Kelly Errington, and Kendra & Ryan Webster.
I knew that Kendra Webster had a daughter in July named Mackenzie that was experiencing some medical complications. Then, yesterday on Facebook I read that the funeral services were beautiful. The last time I saw Kendra Webster, she was a beautiful newlywed that lit up the room every time she entered it. Kendra and I worked in the same building in Utah for American Express. I didn't know if she would be blogging about what she was going through. She was...and I hope that her words will help others in similar situations.
Kendra, I have no idea what it feels like to go through what you've been through. So many of us mothers don't know. I hope that in time you are able to find peace, be healed, and experience motherhood again if you choose. I cannot imagine the anger, the denial, the bargaining, the questioning, the aching. As such a young, sweet mother, you've had to live lifetimes in your four short months with Mackenzie. You've had to grow so much in your last three weeks and make decisions that most of us hope to live a lifetime and never experience.
Jay woke up to me sobbing while reading your blog. He wanted me to read it aloud to him, so I did. We started at the top, then went down to the day of your anniversary, November 16th, to retrace the progression of your last three weeks. Afterwards, we went and held our children in the middle of the night. Then, we held each other.
Kendra & Ryan Webster's blog: kendraandryanwebster.blogspot.com
Mackenzie Rye Webster, 7/18/2009 - 12/13/2009
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