Day Thirty-One: Reflection

Thirty days ago, you made the decision to change your life.

It came in the form of a New Year's Resolution. If you're story is like mine, then your decision wasn't easy. It probably took a lot of pain to come to the conclusion that you needed to make some changes. Only you could make them. There was no magic pill, there was no immediate solution, and nobody in the world could do it for you. You started putting one foot in front of the other.

It is time to reflect on what you've accomplished thus far.

The journey is far from over, but it is time to take a moment to celebrate what you've done. Now is the time to 30-day photos. Now is the time to journal the difference in sleep and energy levels. Now is the time to re-examine choices, think candidly about food addictions, and consider when you're eating emotionally instead of for sustinance.

The hardest part is the first 90 days. We're already a third of the way there.

I hope that you never go back to that place where you were. I hope that you stay focused on taking care of yourself, regardless of how difficult it may feel at times. I hope you feel balanced, and if you don't, I hope that you begin to see a little clarity as to what is out of balance in your life.

Sometimes we have to give up some things to make room for our priorities that have been missing.

I challenge you to shed your clothing and take some photos. I challenge you to food journal. I challenge you to reward yourself with a massage, a facial, or some time away engaging in an activity you enjoy. I challenge you to take a moment, look in the mirror, and give yourself a big smile.

Day Thirty: Coffee Drinks

It seemed that at first there was one Starbucks, then there were millions. Coffee houses exploded across the US sometime in the 1990s. Who doesn't love a good cup of dark roast? The caffeine is like starch on a collar, immediate perk. It also has antioxidants that many experts say are good for you if consumed in moderation.

However, we've got major variations on coffee drinks now, and many of them should be treated as if they were dessert. Some have just as many calories and sugar.

Brewed Coffee: 5 calories
Cafe Americano: 15 calories
Cafe Latte: 220 calories
Starbucks Cafe Mocha No Whip: 290 calories
Starbucks Cafe Mocha Whip: 360 calories
Starbucks Cappuccino: 140 Calories
Starbucks Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha Whip: 560 calories
Starbucks Vanilla Frappucino Whip: 430 calories

I challenge you to examine your coffee drink consumption, making any changes you feel led to make. I challenge you to try green tea as a great alternative.

Day Twenty-Nine: Sensuality

We are sexual creatures, and the sensuality of a woman is the source of much of the art & beauty in this world. I would argue that there is nothing more beautiful than the human form.


I didn't feel sexy. For five years, I felt frumpy. I felt like the best years of my life were floating around somewhere in my past before I had babies. I was mad at my children because having them took my body from me. I was angry at my husband because he didn't appreciate the enormous sacrifices I'd made. I was upset when I'd see a pregnant woman who had gained a healthy 20-30 pounds instead of the 45 I gained.

I was mad...at me.

How could I have taken such poor care of myself? I didn't want people to take my photo. When pictures were taken of me, I'd pray that they wouldn't somehow end up where anyone might see them. Those photos now motivate me more than anything because I can see how unhappy I was behind my smiling eyes. The worst part of it was that the inside felt just as bad, just as bleak as my outside...maybe even more-so.

Sound familiar?

It's sad that I'd place so much emphasis on my physical appearance, but it's true. It's also true for the thousands of women out there who seek breast augmentations, lip injections, liposuction, and any other physically alterating procedure to make themselves look more attractive. There's a very strong correlation between how we feel about our body and how we feel. We see it in the thousands of women in America who are obese and on antidepressants. Which causes which? Maybe it's a little of both.

One of those amazing bonuses that comes with weight loss & healthy habits is the sensuality that returns to the soul. The skin regains its vibrance, there is more confidence in the human form, we put on outfits in the bedroom that haven't been worn in years. We feel sexy again.

I challenge you to examine your sensual side. Are you confident in how you look and feel? Do you find a correlation between how you feel about your body and how you feel in general? I challenge you to continue to journal, adding your sensual side to your comments and observations.

Day Twenty-Eight: Alcohol

I love a good glass of wine, a nice bottle of tequila. I enjoy it when I recieve them as Christmas and birthday presents. However, drinking alcohol can be a hindrance to healthy living, and governing it should be done by anyone who consumes. It has addictive properties, can hinder the function of vital organs, dehydrates the body, amd very much inhibits weight loss.

A 4 oz glass of wine has on average 80-100 calories. Vodka and tequila have about 60 -65 calories per 1 oz serving. Margaritas, frozen drinks, and drinks made with juices can have anywhere from 350-700 calories per glass. They are usually loaded with sugar. We're supposed to be eating 400 calories per meal; about 1500 calories total a day. Two frozen pina coladas can run up to 1400 calories...it's easy to see why alcoholic beverages can wreck the most strict of diets.

The presence of alcohol has also been shown to affect the REM cycle, changing both the amount and the restfulness of one's sleep. Every single time one drinks, the liver has to go to work. The job of the liver is to filter out the toxins in the body...so we can only imagine how beneficial or detrimental it is to our body. It has been shown to increase visceral fat tissue, increase appetite, and reduce inhibitions so one is more prone to think, "Why not?" when confronted with a fork and a cheesecake.

I challenge you to think candidly about your alcohol consumption, and make any changes in consumption that you feel led to make.

Day Twenty-Seven: Alicia Marie's Fitness Tips

1. Set both wight loss & atletic goals (i.e. lose 20 pounds & complete a 10K)

2. Tell the world - we're more likely to stick to something if we've told others we're doing it.

3. Procrastination is the enemy. Your diet doesn't begin next week, it begins now.

4. Do a refrigerator clean out day to get rid of the junk.

5. Stuff refrigerator with good, nutritious foods & snacks.

6. Find workout buddies or partners.

7. Get the facts. Fruit is not bad for you, do your research & educate yourself.

8. Use a food journal.

9. Lift heavy - it will boost your metabolism, builds lean muscle, & burns more calories than cardio.

10. Never EVER go to a party starving. Eat healthy before you go.

11. Join a gym close to home or work.

12. Don't be afraid to experiment with new activities like a cardio pole-dancing or trapeze class.

13. Pre-workout meals should be light & provide carbs.

14. Post-workout should consist of protein & carbs.

15. Invest in cute or flattering workout clothing.

16. Keep your gym bag packed at all times.

17. Dining out - substitute veggies for fries, go w/ healthy options. It will cost more, but it's worth it.

18. Challenge yourself - do the triathlon, make lofty long-term goals.

19. If you don't know, hire a pro. A good personal trainer can be one of your best investments.

20. Get used to drinking lots of water. Eight 8-ounce glasses a day will support your bodily functions, including fat burning.

Day Twenty-Six: Teach Your Children Well

It's a taboo topic....it's only recently beginning to be discussed in the candid nature that it should be. The children's movie "Wall-E" addresses it, and the CDC has begun to finally bring about increased awareness. Slowly, we're all starting to give this huge, gaping wound in our society the proper attention that it needs.

Our beautiful children are getting sick.

I see overweight children at the park decline to play tag or play on the monkeybars. I assume that it's related to their self-perception regarding their speed, agility, and muscular strength. With their head down and eyes low, I see their confidence diminishing. It absolutely breaks my heart.

"Onset diabetes" used to be called, "Adult Onset Diabetes". The name has changed because of the population of people now getting it...and the CDC has now reported that one-third of all children born after the year 2000 with be getting this disease during their life. One-third!!!


Onset diabetes is a travesty of a disease. The general symptoms go like this...it begins with frequent urination. There's an increase in appetite and thirst, blurred vision, and fatigue. In an post-pubescent male, often there is an inability or difficulty to have an erection. The blood begins to thicken. As an abnormally high blood sugar level is sustained over a long period of time, the individual may have limbs of their body cut off. Some go blind. The diabetic is at serious risk for having a heart attack, stroke, and kidney failure. Think about it - if the blood is too thick because of the sugar in it, it becomes harder for the blood to travel smoothly and freely in  the body. It would make sense that a foot wouldn't get the blood circulation it needs and begin to die. It is easy to understand how a heart attack or stroke (vessel blockage in the brain) could occur. Also, since the Body Mass Index of someone with onset diabetes is often high, there is just too much body for their little heart to continue to work. Some people have fainting spells because the amount of oxygen making it to the brain is not enough.

In most cases, onset diabetes is entirely avoidable.

Our children eat what we give them. They play when we allow them to. They are victims of our poor choices. Just as we teach our children to go pee in the potty or to read and write, we must also teach them how to take care of their bodies and minds in a manner that promotes health and wellness. Multiple studies have shown that when they eat well and get exercise, their behavior improves. There are some insightful publications that demonstrate how children with healthy habits think clearly, get better grades in school, have more confidence, experience less depression and anxiety, have more deep and restful sleep, and feel more social acceptance. These are areas that have lasting effects and impact their overall quality of life.

We must teach our children well, and the best way to do so is to teach through example.

I challenge you to begin cooking healthy meals for your entire family. I challenge you to make kid-friendly meals that they will love that give them every tool they need for success. Eat Well Kids has some amazing recipes that include healthy pizza, whole -wheat spaghetti with turkey meatballs, and snacks they'll appreciate.

Day Twenty-Five: Reward Yourself

"I've been so good this week, I deserve a treat..."
"I've had a rough day, I deserve a chocolate chip cookie..."
"If you do well on the test, then we'll go and get ice cream...."

We've all been caught in the trap of rewarding ourselves or our children with food. Let's face it, rewarding with food is fast, easy, and effective. I know it works that if I tell my children that if they obey in the restaurant, I'll give them something sweet afterwards. Here's the problem with that....one day, our children will begin telling themselves that if they are good, they deserve something sweet. And thus, an emotional eater is then born.

Food is not a reward. Food is food.

We eat when we celebrate. We eat when we're depressed. We eat when we all get together, and we eat when we're feeling alone. We eat when we've done great, and we eat when we've done poorly. We eat when we're hungry, and sometimes we eat when we're already full.

And we develop emotional attachments with food.

Let's face it....much of life is bumpy. We get through a down time and then want to reward ourself on the upswing with something that makes us feel positive. So, we can still do that....we just don't do it with food.

I challenge you to come up with several rewards that are not food. These should be healthy, effective, and individually specific to your likes and interests. Some really great rewards include a manicure, a massage, time away with your spouse or time alone engaging in an activity that you enjoy.  Some children's favorite rewards include playtime at the park, playing a game together as a family, and swimming.

Day Twenty-Four: Getting It Up...

....your heart rate, that is....

Yesterday's post was all about strength training, and today's is about what lies on the other side of that coin...the integral part of cardiovascular exercise into our fitness regimen.

"Cardio" exercise is aerobic exercise that benefits our cardiovascular health. We know we're engaging in cardio work when our heart rate elevates into a slightly uncomfortable zone where we begin sweating, our breath becomes slightly labored, and we are burning more calories than from normal day-to-day activities.

During cardio, our blood vessels dialate. Blood flows quickly through them, oxygen from the lungs oxygenates the blood and moves to the muscle tissue where the work is being done. Routine cardio over time reduces our blood pressure, reduces the strain on the heart to move blood around the body, increases our HDL levels (the good cholesterol), and burns calories contributing to our overall weight loss goals.

I would argue that intense cardio is the single best way to expel negative energy out of the body reducing our stress levels and bringing about deep, restful sleep. Also, because of the increase in our circulation with cardio, more oxygen gets around and waste is removed more easily from the tissues, giving our skin that glow.

Our exercise routine should include both: Strength training and cardiovascular exercise.

The trick to doing cardio work is to change it up. Running three miles three times weekly can get very boring. There are a ton of fitness classes and home routines that can provide variety to our schedule. Beachbody Fitness provides in-home fitness programs such as P90X, Insanity, and Turbofire while gym memberships offer classes from kickboxing to aerobics to strip-tease dancing. There literally is something for everyone.

I challenge you to examine your fitness program. If your cardiovascular routine is light, I challenge you to kick it up with both variety and intensity. You should be getting your heart rate up on a regular basis so that you are in heart-healthy condition.

Day Twenty-Three: Pumpin' It

If we were to take a poll regarding strength training and lifting weights, this is probably what it would reveal:

Most Men:
- Love lifting weights
-Often lift far more weight than they should, allowing their form to deterioriate as they swing and grunt trying to get the weight up
-Prefer lifting weights to doing cardio work

Most Women:
-Hate lifting weights because they don't want to "bulk up"
-Often lift far too little weight, using almost no resistance as they lift something as if it were a feather
-Prefer doing cardio work to lifting weights

Here are the facts about strength training...
-It is the single best way to lose weight. Even though it's mostly anaerobic exercise, one burns more calories and increases their metabolism throughout the next 24 hours through strength training.

-It's fun...much more fun than jogging on a treadmill.

-It's as inexpensive as you want it to be. Pushups, pullups, and yoga poses all use body weight instead of weights or bands...you don't need a fancy gym membership or expensive equipment.

-It makes your body more attractive. It firms up things that are jiggly, it pushes up things that long ago began sagging, it helps your body defy gravity and aging.

-It increases bone density, reducing the chance of osteoporosis.

-Lifting the proper amount is crucial...not too much or too little. If you want bulk, you should be doing 8-10 reps. If you want definition without the bulk, you should be doing 12-15 reps. Regardless, the last 3 reps should be difficult.

-If you're doing it correctly, it won't "bulk you up", it will instead slim you down.

-When your form deteriorates, you're done. If you didn't get as many reps out as you wanted, then lighten your load.

I challenge you to examine your strength routine. If it's not as challenging as it should be, I challenge you to kick it up a notch.

Day Twenty-Two: Love Letters To Your Soul

"Reality:

You sabotage yourself. You judge others. You're emotional. You eat foods that make you feel lethargic, tired, cranky. You worry about what others think. You're out of balance, you ache desperately for more time with your children. You miss your husband and wish for a conversation with him like you used to have - two friends laughing, loving, enjoying each other's presence...

Truth:

You are right where you are supposed to be. God is working in you and in others right now. Let it go.

You will have it. You will let it go, and one day you will have it. It will happen in God's time, not yours. You'll have the balance and energy you crave, the time and relationships you desire. You'll stop feeling shame over those areas of your life that you had no control over. You'll stop judging others for who they are as you begin to accept and love yourself for who you are. You'll be real, honest, and won't have to hide behind what you think that you should be.

Release it. God is asking you to stop clenching your hands around it and place it into His hands. Let it go. You are beautiful, you are loved, you are growing. Give Him this burden."

(one of Mariah's love letters from 2008)

Listen to yourself.

What do you say in the still silence of your soul? Are you kind and gentle with yourself? Do you love where you are in life? Are you enjoying the journey as well as the destination it will one day bring you to?

I challenge you to pull out the love letter you wrote at the beginning of this month. If you didn't write it, you can follow this link to the post. I challenge you to continue to write love letters along this journey. When you're having a rough day, when things aren't going as you'd expect...when you wish that the weight would fall off quicker...I challenge you to choose to respond differently than you've done in the past.

Respond with a love letter to your soul.

Accept yourself and your situation for what it is, realize what it is that you really want, and commit fully to enjoying the journey of moving in that direction.

You are beautiful, you are loved, you are growing. Give Him the burden.

Day Twenty-One: The Wrench

When we establish structure, our spouse knows what to expect, our children are comfortable with our schedule. It's easier to pack lunch for work, make breakfast in the morning, and know what workout classes to take at the gym with our favorite trainers. It also lets us plan around birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, days when our children are off school, and travel.

Planning is important, especially early-on.

We need to plan our weeks with structure, but begin to allow for an element of flexibility. There are hiccups that are going to occur...that birthday party we forgot about, or a child throwing up at 2 am...If we know that life's wrenches will be thrown into the mix, we can plan for them ahead of time so they don't derail us.

It's okay if you have to miss a Thursday workout, just move it to a workout on Sunday when you were planning a day off. Pull out the gym schedule, see what classes are offered on that day instead, and change it up that week. You can also get a system for at-home workouts, but make sure that it's a system that will get a good, strong workout in & your heart-rate up. Working out at home should be just as productive as working out at the gym.

What we shouldn't do is throw the baby out with the bathwater & say..."Well, I already blew it because my daughter got sick, I'll try again next week." Become creative, move stuff around, negotiate with others if there are responsibilities involved so that they're getting their needs met as well, and get a fantastic workout in on a day you'd normally take off.

Treat it like the priority in your life that it is.

I challenge you to plan for the wrench....purchase a home system, keep a copy of the gym schedule posted at work and at home...keep your workout bag packed with a water bottle, workout magazine, and great weight exercises...keep your iPod stacked with great songs and your running shoes close at hand.

Day Twenty: Realistic Goals

For years, I wanted to look like Gwyneth Paltrow. I loved the waify look of her body type, the long, lean, willowy frame. But Gwyneth has an ectomorphic body type, and I've got way too much natural muscle tone to look like her.

Isn't it that we always seem to want what we cannot have?

Setting realistic and reasonable goals is crucial. Your first two weeks of ANY weight loss program will most likely show you losing anywhere between 5-10 pounds. This is water weight. Water is retained in the body when we have a poor diet full of soda, chips, fast food, and anything else that is high in sodium. When we stop consuming those items, water naturally is shed by the tissues in our body and we see an immediate drop in the scale.

Then...nothing.

Our weight loss may slow to 1-2 pounds a week, or even seem to stall completely for a few weeks. Why? Muscle weighs more than fat, and if we're working out, we are probably exchanging muscle for fat. This gives us an unrealistic perception of how we're actually doing.

That's one reason why we take pictures.

Thinking that you're going to lose 40 pounds in the course of a month or two is not only unrealistic, it can be damaging. If we diet too heavily or take our caloric intake too low, the body's natural response is to slow our metabolism to retain fat. It thinks that it's starving, and so it does everything it can to slow the weight loss process.

Instead, what we do is that we replace poor choices with healthier ones, developing new habits that we retain for the long haul.

We don't stop snacking....we change what we're snacking on and how much snacking we do. Instead of reaching for the chips, we reach for an apple with a spoon of natural peanut butter. Instead of searching out the soda, we reach for a glass of ice water.

It will take months...it may take years. But, each month will be better than the month before. Along the way, you'll reach amazing benchmarks.

Now...what to do about that self-perception when you have a different body type than what you want?

It doesn't matter if you're waify or muscular, pear-shaped, or look like a string-bean. If you're at the right weight for your frame and living a healthy lifestyle, you glow. Your body looks fantastic regardless of the shape. Your skin radiates, and your eyes whiten and brighten. You stand up a little straighter and feel a little better about yourself.

Don't worry about that which you cannot change, instead work with what you have.

I challenge you to be patient. I challenge you to examine the body type that you naturally have, and find celebrity role models with that type of body who look amazing... i.e. Jennifer Lopez (pear), Kelly Ripa (muscular), Gwyneth Paltrow (willowy).

Day Nineteen: Getting Our Needs Met

Diapers need changing, coffee needs making, homework doesn't do itself. Making lunches, making dinner, getting a shower in, writing reviews, taking phone calls, meeting with the boss, Mommmm!!...

It can be enough to drive someone crazy.

We wear many hats...girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife, lover, father, mother, employee, boss, friend, daughter.... We have responsibilities that come with choices we have made in our lives. However, we also have needs of our own, and responsibilities to ourselves that need to be met. For a long time, I thought that being a mother meant that your needs never come first again.

If you can identify with this, then understand that this feeling comes not from an area of selflessness, but from an area of poor self-confidence. It comes from wanting to feel needed in order to feel worth. It is an incorrect notion, and requires reprogramming messages that you've long-held in your psyche.

How do you know you feel this way?

If you are your last priority, if working out doesn't get done because of time and/or money, if you find yourself handling the majority of household or work responsibilities while feeling like you kinda missed the boat when it comes to yourself, then maybe you're putting yourself last. Do you feel that if you do things for other people, they'll come to realize the sacrifices you've made and appreciate you for it...however that never seems to happen?

Does it leave you feeling victimized or resentful?

If you feel this way, I challenge you to write down the messages that you've been sending yourself. For example, "I want to work out, but I don't have enough time in my day because of my responsibilies...I want to eat right, but my children want chicken nuggets & I can't get them to eat healthy food and I don't want to cook 2 dinners...I want to go to the gym, but my husband gives me a guilt trip even though he has time to tinker in the garage...."

Then, I challenge you to examine your needs, and construct new messages that incorporate these needs while balancing the needs of others. For example, "I want to work out, and to do so means that I need to share responsibilities with other members of the household so that I am not doing everything for everyone...I want to eat right, and that means that my children will also eat healthy tonight instead of chicken nuggets...I want to go to the gym and my husband needs time for himself in the garage. We can each have one hour to ourselves while the other covers the household responsibilities..."

Remember, if you don't respect your needs, chances are that no one else will.

Day Eighteen: Emotional Eating And Obesity

Obesity is defined as one with a Body Mass Index of 30 or higher. One can calculate their BMI with this tool. Not all emotional eaters are obese, but chances are that if someone is obese, they are probably an emotional eater.

I came across a Q&A with Trainer Jackie Warner that I found very insightful regarding emotional eating and obesity that addresses the mind/body connection..

"I worked with morbidly obese people on season 3 of 'Work Out' & continue to work with obese clients today. The physical work is not hard at all. It's the deep emotional work that is difficult. Obesity is a physical sign of a dangerous addiction. People literally eat themselves to death & poison their bodies. It can't be hidden and carries with it a great deal of self-loathing and emotional problems.


When I work with an obese client, we go back to their childhood & find out why they use food as a drug. Many painful memories & feelings come up that need to be worked through. I find a way to change the person's self-perception & their views of the world around them along with their body.


I set physical & weight loss goals. For example, I get them to set a goal of walking around their block every night 7 times or taking the 11 flights of stairs twice before each workout. Bigger physical goals are things like participating in a 3K. We go grocery shopping, and I teach them about healthy foods. We talk about how they feel while on their journey & how to change their relationship with food."

I challenge you to continue to think about your relationship with food, especially food that is bad for your health. If you find that you eat foods to satisfy emotional needs, I challenge you to journal your thoughts & feelings. If you are courageous, willing, and ready, psychological assistance may be needed to work through some of these issues.

Day Seventeen: Sugar Addiction

Out of all of the questions, the ones that I am emailed the most are about sugar. One person said that when she walks down the candy aisle at Walgreens, her mouth begins to salivate.

I am right there with you.

The study of addiction to sugar is something that is getting attention and funding. A recent Priceton University Psychology Study reported that rats demonstrate addictive behavioral patterns towards sugar of increased intake, signs of withdrawal, craving, & relapse. Rats show bingeing behavior with sugar, changes in brain function, & increased sensitivity to psychostimulants after exposure (another possible component of addiction). While there are a number of schools of thoughts about whether or not someone could be addicted to sugar, I tend to think that some people can be.

Why?...

Is it easier for you to not have a sugary candy at all, because once you have one you lose control & can't stop? Do you want something sugary when you feel sad, angry, or upset? Can you go without processed sugar for one day, two days, five days without it changing your mood? Do you sneak sugary foods or candy when other people aren't looking? Do you obsess about that chocolate eruption cake, craving it for hours afterwards?

If so, you're not alone. Here are some tips...

Realize that you are, in fact, addicted to sugar. Think about when & why you crave it. Food journaling can help uncover a sign of something deeper that needs attention.

Eat more fruits & sweet vegetables.

Choose complex carbohydrates from whole grains (brown rice, whole wheat bread, quinoa, millet, whole oats) versus from white flour.

For breakfast, balance protein/fat/fruit to even out your blood sugar (omelette with strawberries on the side, cottage cheese with fruit, greek yogurt with banana or berries). These will work together to stabilize your blood sugar early in the morning and keep it stable throughout the day.

Cut out sodas, including that afternoon diet coke. Minimize caffeine throughout the day. Caffeine affects the body's blood sugar levels and insulin release. If you're exercising, getting enough sleep, drinking enough water, & eating correctly, you should have energy during the day without caffeine.

Try going 5 days without refined sugar, then plan and have your 2 cheat meals. During cheat meals, watch portion sizes. Don't deprive the body of sugar completely. Complete depriviation can lead to bingeing. In time, the body will naturally adjust and it will feel comfortable to drop down to one cheat meal, then none.

Beware of hidden sugars or sugar by another name. Ketchup, salad dressings, cough drops, BBQ sauces, teriyaki sauce, juices, even McDonalds french fries all have added sugar.

I challenge you to think candidly about any patterns in your sugar intake, journaling where applicable. I challenge you to try agave nectar, a natural sweetner with a lower glycemic index than honey or sucrose. It is located in the sweetner section at the grocery or health food store.

Day Sixteen: Fad Dieting

Fad diets don't work...old saying, but yet so many of us try them anyway. I know better than anyone, I was on some version of the Atkins diet for years.

It was a successful diet until the carbs found me.

If it doesn't make sense, then it's probably not sustainable. One might lose a quick 5-10 pounds (which they'll do with normal dieting just by reducing sodium intake and shedding water weight). But ultimately, one will fail....every time. More often than not, one will gain back more than what they lost.

Does it make sense to do nothing but drink a water/lemon/cayenne/maple mixture as sustenance all day? No, but yet so many I know have done the "lemonade diet". The same is true for Slimfast, HCG, Atkins, and a whole host of fad diets that are popular.

The only sustainable diet is to eat nutritiously. We should be consuming mostly plants, balancing starches with proteins, fats, and vitamins.

I challenge you to abandon your fad dieting altogether. I challenge you to pick up a copy of In Defense Of Food by Michael Pollan. He has amazing advice for eating nutritiously balanced meals from now on.

Day Fifteen: Before And After Photos

Mariah Before (Top) and After (Bottom)

Jason Before and After












I bet that you haven't had any photos taken of you voluntarily that have revealed any kind of skin for quite some time.

Shame can do that to us.

We can lose perspective on our road to health. Once the temptations start to set back in, we can forget why we're not eating that chocolate birthday cake at the office party. We look in the mirror, and see the same thing that we saw yesterday...because weight loss is slow to come and our eyes deceive us. We step on the scale and wonder if the pounds will ever shed.

There are two things we should do to establish our benchmarks: Take measurements and take photos.

We are critical on ourselves, and often when we look in the mirror we see flaws, not progress. It seems narcissistic to take photos of ourself along this journey, but it's the only way to get an accurate picture of what we look like. The measurements also tell us a lot - where we're gaining muscle, where we're losing fat.

After awhile, our "before" photos no longer shame us, they motivate us. We can forget how unhappy and unhealthy we were. When we look at those before photos, it reminds us of where we were when we started. They motivate us to never allow ourselves to go back to that place again.

I challenge you to shed your clothing and take some photos now. You don't have to show them to anyone. I challenge you to continue to take photos of yourself every 30 days to document this journey. Not only should these photos show your body's transformation, but also the changes in your skin. Remember...young, clean, firm skin is one of the most amazing benefits of living a healthy lifestyle.

Day Fourteen: Injecting Motivation

It's not about how you look...or is it? We all want to live a healthy, happy, balanced life. Isn't that what we're striving for? However, when it comes to motivation, is there anything more motivating to most of us than to positively change the way we look?

Today is day fourteen, which means that half of the New Year's Resolutioners have already begun to taper off...the gyms are starting to slim back down to the dedicated few....Right now is when all the bad food at the office your coworkers are eating starts calling your name.

Right about now is when it gets difficult. That's why right now is the time to inject some motivation.

I challenge you to go buy that swimsuit now, book that cruise where you'll wear it. I challenge you to sign up for that 5K, it will kick your butt into gear to train harder and eat nutritiously.

I challenge you to find a picture of you at the weight you used to be, or that pair of jeans you can't wait to be able to get back into...figure out what it is that motivates you and use it to influence your mind in the right direction.

Day Thirteen: Getting Over The Guilt

My biggest obstacle when I began working out and eating right was guilt. Most of it was self-imposed.

I left my home daily at 6:10 & didn't get back until almost 6:00 at night. My two children were very small at the time, and needed much more time with me than they were getting. My husband needed his wife. I needed time with my children, time with my husband, and time for my health.

There just was not enough time in the day.

How to we get fit when there are so many demands on our time? How do we keep from feeling guilty when we take time away from those we love to fit exercise into our schedule?

There are no golden eggs here, no secret keys that unlock the door. We try to minimize the time away through time-management skills. We work out for a shorter duration, if we have to, with an increased intensity. We utilize late nights, early mornings, and lunch hours where we can. We also remember all of the amazing benefits to us and our family that a healthy lifestyle brings...

We will live a longer, fuller life with our spouse. We will have more energy at the playground with our children. We will be less iritable at home, feel sexier for our lover, and cook healthier meals for the benefit of all. We also realize that everyone, no matter who they are, needs at least 30 minutes to an hour a day for themselves so that balance can be maintained and resentment and feelings of victimization don't set in.

Some choose a gym membership with childcare. Others workout after the kids have gone to bed. Some arise at 5am to sweat. There are those that walk during lunchbreaks.

If getting fit is really a priority for you, you'll be creative with it.

I challenge you to stop feeling guilty about working out, instead making sure that its at a time that is least intrusive on your schedule and other responsibilities. I challenge you to treat it with the priority it deserves.

Day Twelve: Comfort Food

My dad's old time comfort food is a Whataburger Jr. I yearn for a piece of chocolate and a Starbucks latte when I'm having it rough. Others may wish for mom's apple pie or her meatloaf...

"Comfort food" got its name for a reason.

There are certain emotions that we tie with certain foods. They "comfort" us. It could be a memory. It could be the way that it affects your central nervous system (i.e. chocolate increasing seratonin levels). It could just be that you're missing someone when you're having a rough day, and the thought of a certain meal reminds you of them.

We need to begin to recognize our triggers. This doesn't mean that we abandon our comfort food. However, we need to begin to see the role that our emotions play into what we're putting into our bodies. When we recognize that we want that cheeseburger, think about what we really want. Is it time with our dad who passed away years ago? Is it the feeling of sadness that makes us want that double chocolate cake, or is it something else?

Until we really begin to associate what we do with why we do it, we really don't understand what's underneath that behavior. Emotional eating is all about eating to satisfy certain emotional cravings that we have....emotional cravings that are normal.

I challenge you to start to take an introspective look at the comfort foods that you crave, and when you crave them. I challenge you to use your food journal to begin to document these, paying close attention to your mood and your heart.

Day Eleven: Balance

I went on a walk once about 7 years ago with a lifetime girlfriend of mine. During our walk, we were discussing our work/life balance. She made a statement that has stuck with me ever since. "I understand that work is a really, really important component for people. But, it's only one component in someone's life and for so many people, their entire identity is wrapped up in their job. They neglect their families, their friends, themselves..."

We chase something, and life passes us by. It could be a paycheck or a lifestyle. It might be the respect of our peers, a promotion, the gratitude of our boss...it's an issue when it absorbs time, energy, and priority from other important areas of our life that receive a deficit of attention. It throws us out of whack, and there are negative consequences for this.

Being healthy & happy is really about bringing ourselves back into a state of balance. When we haven't been getting enough physical activity, nutrients, and water, our body shows it. Our skin gets muddled, our muscles become flabby, we have indigestion, we have difficulty sleeping. Sometimes, we even begin to get sick - heart disease, onset diabetes, irritable bowel syndrome...

However, we can also overdue it in the other direction, too. Not only do we need cheat meals to make us feel like we're not deprived, we also need rest & repair days. Too many days of rigorous physical activity can lead to injury and fatigue.

So what is the right amount of work & play, exercise & rest? Our body, mind, and soul tell us...if we listen.

I challenge you to listen to your body, mind, and soul. You'll know when you haven't worked out enough...and you'll know when you're overdoing it. If things are stressing you out that absorb time, energy, or sleep, I challenge you to incorporate rest, relaxation, and time away from those things to bring yourself back into a state of balance.

Day Ten: Portion Control

The average american adult consumes 2 cups of spaghetti when they sit down to eat. A portion of spaghetti is 1/2 cup, so that means that the average person consumes 4 servings in a meal instead of 1. The same is true for the garlic bread, spaghetti sauce, and meatballs. Added all together, the average american will consume 4 servings of spaghetti, 2 servings of garlic bread, 2 servings of tomato sauce, and 2-3 servings of meatballs in one sitting.

We live in an America where everything is supersized. The result is that it has supersized us. We must pay close attention to not only what we are eating, but the amount as well.

One of the best ways to keep our portions in-check is to consume healthy food, put only the right portion sizes on our plate, and recognize when our body is full. It is much easier to overeat cheeseburgers than it is to overeat veggies. Getting used to what portion sizes look like on a plate is important, so that we understand more or less what a portion looks like in front of us. Recognizing when our body is full is imperative, and to do this we should eat slowly and listen to what our body is saying. When our body says, "I'm full now", we must stop eating...not punch the override button. Remember we will continue to get more full a few minutes after we've stopped eating.

So what happens when someone spoons out heaping portions onto our plate? We tell them that we won't eat even half of that...and we don't want it to go to waste.

Remember, only you control what enters your body, not someone else.

I challenge you to visit www.mypyramid.gov to see what the proper portion sizes are prior to consuming your next three meals.

Day Nine: Sleep

Ahhh...to sleep like a baby.

One of the best biproducts of adopting a healthy lifestyle is the change in both the quality and the amount of sleep, and the ability to wake up refreshed and energized.

Natural sleep is important, and it is something that cannot be forced. While nutrition, exercise, and water intake are all things that we have control over as inputs into our system, natural sleep is often a result.

Most people can achieve deep, natural sleep by having the right inputs. During the hours we are sleeping at night, our body repairs itself. There are studies that show that a sleep deprivation affects mood, emotional health and physical energy; slows our ability to heal wounds; is a risk factor for weight gain, hypertension, & Type 2 diabetes. It is also associated with depression, alcoholism, and bipolar disorder. Getting too much sleep is not good for you, either. Seven to eight hours nightly is what is recommended.

"Natural" sleep means that you fall asleep without the aid of any type of sleep-aid substance such as alcohol, Tylenol PM, or any other drug.

Exercise & balance are great combatants to sleepless nights. We often worry in the evening, when our mind settles. When the worrying affects our sleep, it's often because there is energy left in the system that is still trying to work itself out. A great way to combat this is with high intensity, calorie-burning workouts. A good yoga session or a deep tissue massage can also help in balancing the stress and moving negative energy out of the system. Sugar, caffeine, & "energy drinks" can cause sleeplessness, especially if consumed in the late afternoon or evening.

The presence of alcohol in the system has also been shown to affect the REM cycles, changing the restfulness of the sleep. If you've ever awoke at 2 am after having a glass or two of wine, you understand this.

I challenge you to observe your sleep patterns closely, associating changes in the patterns with the intake and activities that you do during the day. See if you draw correlations between what you do, what you eat/drink, and how you sleep. I challenge you to note these in your food journal.

Day Eight: Cheating

Chocolate, wine, cheese, coffee...four of the reasons I like Europe. Who doesn't like the rich, sweet taste of good chocolate, wine is so fine, there's nothing like a perky cup of coffee, and where do we even begin with cheese? When I first started eating healthy, I looked forward to my cheat meals all week.

Today is day eight, which means that we are probably yearning for a cheat meal.

Losing weight is a process. Some are able to switch a flip and all of the sudden abandon old habits, never looking back. But, here in the real world...it tends to look a little different. It's more common that one loses weight, gains some of it back, loses more, gains back even more, diets heavily, then abandons all hope and goes berserk.

Not good.

Sugar is addictive. Many people are unable to balance sugar into their daily intake without going overboard. If you tend to lack self-control like me, you may have a sugar addiction. I will go into the addictive properties of the substance next week, but for now we must learn how to cheat so that we gradually reduce our cravings, feel human, and don't all of the sudden abandon our healthy habits because we feel deprived.

Jackie Warner advises that one beginning their healthy lifestyle should eat clean, healthy meals excluding alcohol and processed sugar for 5 days straight. This gets rid of all refined sugar the system & levels out the blood sugar. Doing this curbs sugar cravings substantially. Then, she recommends having two cheat meals (i.e. Fri/Sat dinners adjusting for holidays & special occasions). This could be a movie with popcorn, soda, & candy. This could be a date night at a steak house with a baked potato, wine, & dessert....you choose, mix it up. Keep portion sizes under control.

In time, you will find that you need to cheat less to feel human, and your body will naturally reduce the number of cheat meals to once weekly, then to none without feelings of deprivation. This happens naturally and gradually, and usually follows understanding how cheat meals make your body feel. It comes with the preference to feel clean and refined versus sluggish and bloated.

So, what do you do when you get asked out on an impromptu pizza & beer date? You have a choice. You can choose to forego one of your cheat meals and indulge. However, if you choose to do this you MUST forego a cheat meal. It's about choices, not about deprivation. But, give yourself only two cheat meals weekly.

I challenge you to plan your two cheat meals and enjoy them. Make note in your food journal the difference in the way your body feels after eating cheat meals versus how you feel when you eat clean. Pay special attention to any headaches, sluggishness, sleeplessness, acid reflux, or any sugar rushes you might get.

Day Seven: Water

Think of how you feel in a nice, hot shower. What does it feel like to dive into a cool, crisp swimming pool? Water has an effect on us like no other substance. It is refreshing, cleansing, replenishing. If it does all of that on the outside of our bodies, think of what it does to the inside.

Drinking water is absolutely essential for weight loss. Drinking 3 liters daily doubles our energy by putting more oxygen into our system & burns 50-75 more calories each day. It clears up our skin and improves its elasticity and cellular integrity, it flushes out the toxins stored in our body...and the list goes on.

Its important that we listen to our body, and if our body is thirsty, we give it water. If our body isn't thirsty, then it doesn't need water. We should drink when thirsty, and not try to "push" water into the system. Drinking too much of it is actually damaging and can cause a condition called hyponatremia. About 3 liters of water daily without exceeding 1 liter in an hour is what our bodies need.

Water is water. Vitamin water is not water, nor is any other "water" in the soda cooler that has added flavoring, sweetner, or carbonation. You can dress up your water by adding a slice of lemon or lime, or make "spa water" with a cucumber slice & a strawberry or orange slice.

I challenge you to replace all of your daily drinks with water. Do not drink any soda, iced tea, coffee, juice, alcohol, or other beverage throughout the day. Allow yourself one cup of coffee in the morning, (or whatever your morning drink is) and one cup of hot herbal tea in the evening, and drink water for the remainder of your beverages. I challenge you to do this for the next five days, and examine how you feel.

Day Six: Move Your Butt

Running, hiking, jogging, yoga, weight lifting, kick boxing, stairmaster, pilates, bicycling, walking, cross fit training, swimming, step aerobics, skateboarding, ripstick riding, skydiving, base jumping, paragliding, snorkeling, scuba diving, strip tease dancing....if there are 50 ways to leave your lover, then there are at least 150 ways to get in shape.

Exercise gives us cardiovascular fitness (our heart, lungs, & circulation), improved strength (muscle), bone density, and flexibility. It is important that we educate ourselves on how to exercise properly when beginning a fitness routine. Depending on your fitness goals, all exercise programs are not equal. I'd like to think that some exercise is better than none at all. However, if you can carry on a 15 minute conversation on your cell phone while on the treadmill, then you probably need to kick it up a notch.

The best hour of my day is the one that I spend on myself. I used to feel guilty about this, but I don't anymore. You're not a bad mother, wife, or employee if you love to go out for a run all alone with nothing but the road, the music in your ears, and the feel of your heart pumping. That time daily is essential, like a battery getting re-charged. Here's the thing...if you've only got one hour, why not make it count? Why not sweat like a pig, feel the fat melt away, and make your muscles so tired that they are sore?

I challenge you to try a new exercise, one that you may be afraid of or have always wanted to do. I challenge you to kick up your workout a notch or two...sweat more, work harder, get that heart rate up, increase the intensity.

Your body will thank you for it.

Day Five: Nutrition

I once knew someone who would drink 3 slimfasts a day Monday through Friday. That is all he would have for sustenance each weekday. Then, on the weekends he would gorge on Burger King, McDonalds, and Carl's Jr. Suprisingly, that person wasn't me...that sounds like something I would have done back in the day.

Nutrition is meant to support the body, not deprive it.

There are a number of problems with the plan above. Someone who eats this way doesn't learn how to eat properly. A nutrition plan like this can reak havoc on the metabolism and blood sugar. Micro-nutrients and trace elements are most likely missed consistently. Most importantly, this food plan is unsustainable and will likely encourage, rather than inhibit, disease. These are just a few of the issues with this diet, but there are many, many more.

It is important that we learn how to eat, and to eat properly. There is a lot of conflicting information out there and a number of fad diets. Think of it this way - you're not dieting...dieting is a finite thing that comes to an end. You're changing the way you eat, and that will never end.

It is important that we learn how to cook amazing foods using bright colors. We must learn how to balance starches, proteins, fats, and vitamins through the foods we eat. We must learn what foods are in season so that we consume fruits and vegetables in the height of their nutritional density. We must learn our produce sections, spending time understanding the plethora of amazing leafy vegetables, roots,and fruits that have bold flavors and great texture and are seldom used in urban cooking.

We must begin to shop the perimeter of the supermarket. This is where the produce, meat, cheese, and milk/egg sections are located because they are perishable and must be replenished frequently. They are located nearest the back/side of the supermarket because of easy-access. The more perishable a food, the more you want it in your body. We must incorporate brown rice, lentils, and beans into our intake. They are excellent sources of nutrition.

We should be buying foods that have less than 9 grams of processed sugar. We must read the labels of the foods we buy carefully. If it has more than 9 grams of sugar, it should be reserved for a cheat meal.

Bread should say, "100% Whole Wheat". If it doesn't, then it's not.

We should be eating 5 times a day: Breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner should be about 400 calories. Snacks should be about 150 calories. Some great snacks include a handful of almonds, a piece of cheese with whole wheat bread, cottage cheese, and fruit. To find a the caloric content of foods & get other resource info, http://www.mypyramid.gov/ is a great source.

I challenge you to cook a meal with five distinct colors using no canned vegetables. I challenge you to spend significant time in your local supermarket, shopping the perimeter and coming out of the supermarket on your next visit with no junk food and nothing over 9 grams of processed sugar. I challenge you to find out the fruits/veggies in season and buy three items of produce you've never bought before, using them in your next meal.

Day Four: It's Not About Willpower

You walk by a plate of cookies that are calling your name. You decide not to indulge. The next day, you come home to freshly baked brownies and manage to sidestep them. You start thinking about food, wanting something tempting. Instead of indulging, you stay strong. Then...you finally break down. Instead of eating one oreo, you eat the whole package.

Willpower is all about deprivation, and deprivation leads to shame.

Nobody is strong enough to hold out forever. We try and try to eat all of the right things by having enough willpower to avoid the bad things, then we break down. Then, we beat up ourselves for not being stronger. This does nothing for our bodies and puts our emotional health is a shaming state. Not good.

It's about surrender.

The body is a holy being. It has needs. It has a ph balance and a blood sugar level that it needs to maintain. There are chemical reactions that must to take place for proper cellular functioning so that disease does not occur.

The body requires healthy, natural foods to work properly and water to aid in these chemical reactions. If the body is given too much salt, sugar, or fat, it will impede this from happening. If it is given too little salt, sugar, or fat, it can also impede these processes. We must become very in-tune with what our body is asking of us, and this requires us to pay attention to it. We must surrender to the needs of our body and give it what it is asking for.

Hungry for sugar? If so, your body is probably asking for fruit. Eat a piece of sweet, sugary fruit and see if that satisfies your craving. Do you have a headache? If so, your body might be dehydrated, and you may need water. Do you want coffee or a diet coke? If so, chances are that you need a nap or a cup of green tea. If you're experiencing constipation, you need water, fiber, and exercise. Can't sleep? Try rigorous exercise or some time away from the things that are stressing you out. For every artificial solution out there, there is a more natural one.

I challenge you to stop trying to be so strong. I challenge you to stop beating yourself up when you eat something that isn't good for you. Instead, start by adding in. Add in fruit, plain oatmeal, and egg whites in the morning. Add in nuts, 100% whole wheat or gluten free bread. Add in water. As you start to add-in these things, you will naturally feel your cravings subside for the bad stuff. You'll feel better because you're running on cleaner fuel, and you're giving your body what it needs. I challenge you to begin your food journal for the year. Start documenting what you ate, when you had cravings, how you responded to those cravings, and how you felt after you've consumed something.

Day Three: The Essential 5

Weight loss essentially means putting down the box of cookies and going for a walk...then doing that daily. However, I believe that changing our health is really composed of five main components that are all dependent on one another for balance and homeostasis within the body. Permeated throughout this circle is the psychological view that we have about ourselves, which affects our relationship with all five of these components. Over the next several weeks, I'll go into more detail about each of these.

Nutrition - Eating natural foods, incorporating the right multi-vitamin, reducing processed sugar, eliminating fast food from your intake altogether

Water - Three liters a day, not exceeding one liter in an hour

Sleep - Good, deep, natural sleep

Exercise - Healthy amounts of rigorous exercise on a consistent basis

Balance - Rest/repair days, cheat meals, massage

So, how are these interconnected? When you don't get enough sleep, do you drink more coffee the next day? This means that your sleep deprivation affects your hydration. If you are out of balance and stressed out, do you lose sleep? When you don't get enough exercise, how do you eat? How do you sleep? And the list goes on...

I challenge you to pull out the love letter you wrote to yourself on Dec 26th (go to this post if you didn't write it). Review your love letter, make any additions that may have come to mind since you first wrote it. I challenge you to really think about these essential five components of health and where you are out of balance with these.

Day Two: Establishing Structure

I'm a full time student.

Every semester, my entire world changes. The schedule that I keep revolves around when classes are offered and my personal responsibilities for the care of our children. What that means is that every four months or so, I go through a huge adjustment of trying to figure out where my workout will be, when I'll study, when I attend class, when I work, and when I'm just good-old-mommy.

Some of you are just like me.

Before my return to school, I was in the professional workforce. Twelve hours away from home daily was not uncommon, and therefore there were lots of demands on my time when I got home. I worked out each night after my children went to sleep, because then it worked the best for my schedule.

Some of you travel. Others are single parents. Every single one of us has responsibilities that require our attention and priority.

Establishing a structure that works for you is critical to whether or not you'll be successful in the new year. So many times, we leave our workout for our leftover time. We give everything else the attention that it deserves. If other activities run over into the time we have set aside for exercise, we justify and accept that it's going to happen and resolve to work out on our day off.

That works for one who's seasoned, one who's fit and has maintained priority in their life for exercise for a significant period of time. Someone who's been doing this for a long time understands that flexibility is important. They actually work out on their day off instead of going out on a pizza and beer date to watch the game. They sacrifice, they change up their schedule. They make appropriate adjustments.

For someone who hasn't exercised regularly in a long time, this is one of the biggest causes of becoming derailed.

I challenge you to establish structure, placing your daily workout at the top of your list. Actually write down your daily routine, thinking through when you'll have enough time for the workout, including the hot shower afterwards. Place this somewhere where you'll see it until you've gotten the hang of it. When things come up, I challenge you to NOT diminish your workout time, but find other ways each day of incorporating the activity while still getting-in every minute of your workout.

Flexibility will come later. For now, in the beginning, it's all about establishing structure.

Day One: Out With The Old

It's time to take out the trash.  Literally.

When I was a child, each New Year, my family had this amazing tradition. The night of New Year's Day, the night AFTER all of the champagne and ball drop and staying up until midnight to count down the seconds....the night after all of the hubbub...we had a get together. We went to my dad's cousins house outside of the city limits. We all brought our christmas trees. Then, we built a big fire.

And we burned them.

As we pulled our christmas tree into the fire, we thought about all of that negative energy from the year before. We thought about everything we didn't like, everything that we wanted to change, and we placed all of that negative energy onto that christmas tree. When it went into the fire, the flames shot up many feet into the air. The dried pine needles would sparkle and jump in the most awesome display of firelight. Then, with a clean slate, we started the new year. Fresh energy. A positive outlook. The promise of a cleaner....more purified....

you.

Tonight, we're burning our christmas tree.

We're cleaning out the refrigerator, throwing away all of that christmas candy, cookies, and sludge. We're saying goodbye to old, bad, unhealthy habits, and bringing on a new, positive, healthy energy. We're taking out the trash emotionally, resolving to change, prioritizing our needs along with the needs of others.

I challenge you to have a refrigerator clean out day, ridding both your pantry and your soul of anything emotionally. Take it to the curb and don't look back. Today is your day 1, your fresh start, your clean slate.

Burn that tree.